Maybe I should run for president?

I mean, I don't have any foreign policy credentials either (unless you count a couple of brushes with foreign law enforcement back when I was a Brat and reasonable people had a sense of humor about joints and Jagermeister - you remember - back when most adults realized teenagers are, to a one, pretty much all just hormone-drenched idiots).

But at least I can read a fucking map!

How the hell is Mike Huckabee getting any serious support at all? The fuckers a joke. (Back when I was getting shipped to the G-rents for the summer, and wanking around in the northern tier counties of Missouri, the other teenaged idiots used to say Iowa was an acronym for Idiots Out Wandering Aimlessly. I kinda winced - I also got sent to my Aunts house in the Quad Cities for part of most summers, too, so I kinda took it personally. You know - for my cousin's sake.)

But seriously! Are there that many end-timers up there that think we need to cut to the chase and get Armageddon underway already, cuz they are ready for the rapture? Enough that this clown is leading in the polls? (Here's a clue, you uptight fucking morons. Have an orgasm. That's rapture.)

Here is Mike Huckabee's latest gaffe. I don't know where this idiot went to high school, but where I went to school, if I made a blunder like this, my high school history and geography teacher would get up out of her grave and come to my house, thirty years later - and give me detention and extra work.

He is one of those people that can't find a place on a map. He thinks that Pakistan shares and eastern border with Afghanistan. (Ask any seventh grader in a decent school: It's India.)

People who questioned my view of foreign policy probably need go back and read the speech that I delivered back in Washington in September. … What we’ve seen happen is that in the Musharraf government, he has told us that he really does not have enough control of those eastern borders near Afghanistan to be able go after the terrorists. But on the other hand, he doesn’t want us going in because it violates his sovereignty.

He also, immediately after the assassination of Benazir Bhutto in Pakistan yesterday, played the fear card before her body was cool for his fundamentalist, Christianist, American-Taliban base.

"In light of what happened in Pakistan yesterday, it's interesting that there are more Pakistanis who have illegally crossed the border than of any other nationality except for those immediately south of our border," Huckabee said Friday.

Americans might "look halfway around the world and say, 'How does that affect me?' ... We need to understand that violence and terror is significant when it happens in Pakistan, [and] it's more significant if it can happen in our own cities. And it happens if people can slip across our border and we have no control over them."

"The immigration issue is not so much about people coming to pick lettuce or make beds, it's about people who could come with a shoulder-fired missile and could do serious damage and harm to us," Huckabee said, "and that's what we need to be worried about." (emphasis added)

Senator Iselin Governor Huckabee boldly asserted that he had in his hand a list of 207/104/275 communists employed by the Defense Department 660 Pakistanis entered the United States illegally last year!

Border Patrol says maybe a handful.

(I wish someone would ask him what he thinks about stepping up the effort to keep tabs on Saudi immigrants. After all, the Kingdom supplied 15 of the 19 9/11 hijackers. You remember - the folks who actually attacked us? And who funded all those madrassas in Afghanistan, that produced all those terrorists and Taliban?)

But who ya gonna trust? The professionals who actually, you know, know what the fuck is going on, or a Huckster bible-bleater?

When pinned down about the gaffes later, a Huckabee aid finally just said outright that the Governor is a foreign policy moron, and he had been instructed to steer the issue to immigration when foreign policy came up, because he is totally out of his depth and says stupid shit like Pakistan is west of Afghanistan. (I paraphrase, but I don't really exaggerate.)

The fact that he is polling so well scares the hell out of me. I can live with the occasional wacko end-timer, so long as they have no power or influence and aren't a threat to others (but to themselves? I really could not care less.) But we can't have one of these magical-thinking, superstition believers that close to the levers.

That so many people don't seem to get this, or worse - don't care because he loves Jesus too! - is fucking appalling.