Submitted by J. Carter on Thu, 03/15/2007 - 3:35pm. Blunt-Kinder Administration
Governor Matt "Flounder" Blunt today blasted Attorney General Jay Nixon for the fact that Matt Blunt is Governor. "Everything that has happened since the day I became Governor is Jay Nixon's fault," said Blunt. Flounder pointed out that Nixon neglected to run for Governor in 2000 or 2004.
"If Jay Nixon had simply done his job and run for Governor in 2000 or 2004, I would not be Governor today," said the Governor. "We would not have had the Medicaid cuts or the Ferrell fiasco, probation officers would have gotten the raise they deserve without a court fight, my brother would not have worked for Ameren (who are lieing scumbags now that they fired Andy, by the way), their dam would not have broken, Kurt Schaffer would still be a junior associate at Lathrop Gage, no one would have proposed selling MoHELA assets, Bellfountaine would be open and run appropriately, illegal aliens would not be cleaning state offices, the Department of Labor would not have screwed workers, and now employers, with terrible legal advice and Melanie would have never been photographed in that hideous fur." "Oh, yeah and my father would still be in leadership."
Saturday, March 17, 2007
Because it's fucking hilarious.